It’s really interesting! About a week ago I really started working on a new goal of mine.
The goal is – Not to put out angry words, noises, or gestures into the world.
This goal was to relieve the anger that I felt when I got mad at things or people, and to stop spreading anger throughout the world with my negative energy.
Of course I knew that this wasn’t going to help me stop being angry. I mean I would still get upset about that annoying idiot or thing that didn’t go my way. At least that’s what I thought! I’ve found a completely different outcome taking place though.
What I’ve Discovered While Stopping Negative Energy From Leaving Me
I’ve slipped a few times and raised my voice or made a disgusted face, but for the most part I’ve been pretty good about my new attitude.
Because I couldn’t rant and rave about my anger I had to deal with it in a different way. I’ve found that the way I deal with it is by changing my mind.
I don’t focus on the thing or person or event that made me angry. I instead switch my focus onto something else that doesn’t make me angry, and because I’m not perpetuating the anger by talking about it or making a miserable face I find it easy to switch my mind-set to something more positive.
In doing this I feel a couple of things:
2. I have more patience! – I don’t get instantly upset about things and I find my patience has grown widely just from trying to form this new habit! I can handle the annoying person who talks too loud or the person who cuts me off in traffic for no reason. My tolerance for these people has grown hugely!
I think it’s because I feel their negative attitude and feel bad for them, or I feel glad for myself for not having to feel that, either way it’s working out well.
3. I find I’m getting more things done – I’ve never realized how much time having a negative attitude sucks up out of your day!
First you have to get upset, then you have to complain, then you have to ponder the things that’s making you upset, then you have to complain some more…by the time you are done being upset you could have gotten a lot of productive and positive things done.
Even focusing on productive things is easier because you are not focused on negative things. It’s amazing how deep our focus can be on something negative when we get upset!
I’m Not Holding in My Feelings
I’ve always believed that holding in your feelings is a bad thing. That’s why I’ve always been so volatile and wear my emotions on my sleeve. And that’s why I was a little worried about not expressing my anger. But I was wrong.
I’m not holding in my feelings at all. I’m just not putting out negative vibes into the world or perpetuating my anger.
I still discuss things that are bothering me but I do it in a positive way. This ensures that concerns are being met but it also ensures I’m not overreacting or making a mountain out of a molehill.
For example, I was working in the library the other day and there were two people who were using it as a coffee shop to tell jokes and discuss days events. And they obviously wanted everyone to hear because they were LOUD!
Normally I would stew about the arrogance of these people but instead I calmly asked them (by name) if the could use their library voices because I was trying to concentrate. This allowed me to get right back to work without feeling upset and it also quieted them down!
I can’t explain how good it feels not to dwell on the negative.
And it all starts by not putting negative out into this world. Your forced to find a new solution to dealing with things that come your way.